Write A Letter To Yourself Challenge

*This is an exercise for self confidence I’ve made up. I’m sure others have done this before, but this is to make people realize how far they have come when they feel like things are never going to get better.*

Imagine a younger you, maybe 12-15. Now think of all the things you have learned since you were that age. Yeah, you made some mistakes along the way, but everyone does. Some mistakes might have been much bigger than others, but people can change. Now imagine if you hadn’t had learned what you did from these mistakes. Imagine the type of life you could have been leading right now. Different, isn’t it? What I want you to do is write a letter to your younger self and what you would have wished someone would have told you at that age. I’ll start off with my own letter to myself.

Dear 13 year old Sarah,

Though you may think that you’ll never be pretty like the other girls at school, or that boys don’t like you because you’re not good enough, I’m here to say that you’re wrong. Boys will be boys. Just because you don’t appeal to them now doesn’t mean there won’t be anyone in the future that will value you more than you thought possible. Don’t worry about what boys think, but instead find yourself some friends that won’t turn around and back stab you (seriously, your “best friend” is not really your best friend).

Being the prettiest or the most popular has no meaning after school. Once you’re an adult you’ll find your own style and your own way of doing things that will make you stand out from the crowd. You will never question whether anyone but your significant other likes your outfit or not.

Don’t fall for the first guy who says you’re cute. There is plenty of time before you actually end up meeting the one you plan on marrying.

Most importantly, don’t ever feel like you’ve never accomplished anything in your life. Even the smallest achievements are victories won.

Love, 23 year old Sarah.

Now, I challenge everyone who feels down to help themselves by writing something to their younger selves and really finding out just how much better things are for you today than they were back then.

10 Dollar Mall Review

I recently purchased a dress and a scarf from 10 Dollar Mall and I was surprised at how fast it shipped out. I live in Indiana and the shipping prices were a bit steep for me since I’m always low on money, but honestly their shipping is not as expensive as other sites I’ve bought from.

I did, however have a problem with the scarf. The day my package arrived I opened it and found that there were tears and holes in the scarf. I was upset, but I wrote their customer service and within 24 hours someone responded and asked me to send pictures in order for me to receive a refund. They were really patient with me and the next day of sending my pictures I received my refund on my Paypal.

I know some people have really bad experiences with online retailers, and some don’t. I believe this store is one of those, “Don’t be rude to them and things will be just fine” kind of deals. From what I gathered before shopping with them, they are from California and they offer the lowest deals I’ve ever seen on clothing. I DO recommend trying this site if you want some cheap clothing. Their products, like my dress, are pretty great quality (much better than expected) and I believe that they deserve a good review from someone who is highly critical of shopping for clothes online.

If you have shopped here please comment and let me know your whole experience. I am eager to know what others think of it!

My Frizzy Hair Care Tips

I have ALWAYS struggled with unruly, frizzy hair. My hair is not a perfect curl, it’s more wavy, but I have tiny little curls at the top near my bangs. It took me a long time to figure out what is good for my hair and today’s post will let you know what I do to keep my hair pretty nice.

In high school I dyed my hair quite a bit, but I never had many problems with bad hair. It wasn’t until having my son that my hair turned for the worst. First I tried curl defining shampoo and it made my curls come out beautifully, but I was tired of using the same thing all the time. For a while I just used some regular shampoo and conditioners that had nothing special about them.

Then I bleached my hair…

I had to bleach my hair due to a bad dye job and it hurt my hair badly. My hair felt like straw and when I ran my fingers through it I could feel it getting caught and tangling up. It was gross. That’s when I saw an advertisement for Triple Nutrition from Garnier. I don’t use it now, but I will advise that if you ruined your hair with bleach, use their shampoo and conditioner for a while and it will go back to normal. At least mine did.

So what did I start using after Garnier? Sulfate-free shampoo.

Sulfate-free is much healthier and much better for your hair. If you want to cut chemicals out of your hair than this is the type of shampoo for you. Though it can get a bit pricey, there are some  nice off brands like the ones at Wal-Mart.

Here is the list of things I do right now to help my hair!

  1. Coconut Milk Shampoo by OGX- This shampoo is NEVER in stock at my local Wal-Mart so I buy mine strictly from Ulta. It’s a bit pricey but I never use too much. It does have conditioner to go with it, but I rarely condition my hair so I don’t waste money buying any. When you wash your hair, be sure to use cold water. If you can’t stand cold, try to use lukewarm. Cold water is said to be much better for your hair and it helps reduce frizz. Also, when drying your hair make sure to gently squeeze the rest of the water out of your hair and then wrap your hair in a towel to dry it for only a few minutes.
  2. Coconut Milk Anti-breakage Serum by OGX- This, just like the shampoo itself, is a bit pricey, but I find that it works well right after I shower. Just a little bit of this stuff can go quite a ways in most hair. (It really depends on how long, and how much hair you have) I put this in pretty damp hair and comb it through with my fingers. I use it after taking my hair out of my towel and then I let my hair air dry the rest of the way.
  3. NEVER use a blow dryer- I don’t use blow dryers unless I am using it to help style my hair quickly after a shower. I don’t have a new model blow dryer so there is no diffuser for mine, but it’s recommended to have one on your blow dryer to stop the blow dryer from damaging your hair. If you have no diffuser and can’t afford one, try to blow dry going down and don’t blow dry your roots.
  4. Ouidad Moisture Lock Leave-In Conditioner– This is specifically for curly hair. I used this (I got a travel sample from Ulta) and it made my hair soft, smooth, and it smelled awesome! I HIGHLY recommend this for girls who want their hair to have extra protection, especially on hot summer days.
  5. Ouidad Climate Control Heat & Humidity Gel– This gel will help style your hair while also protecting it from the harsh heat & humidity that comes with summer and other various things in life.

Right now those are all the things I use in my hair, though not always all at once! Haha.

If you have any great tips and tricks, leave a comment and my next blog post about hair care will feature everyone’s tips.

Gastroparesis

Just recently I’ve found out that I have Gastroparesis (GP). All this time of feeling sick and being afraid of leaving the house I have finally learned of what is wrong with me. What does this problem entail?

Symptoms range for each person from either annoying little pains or excruciating pain. I suffer from the latter. What causes it? When your stomach empties too slowly. My doctor had a hard time telling me what I should be avoiding for the simple fact that most people have the problem of losing too much weight with GP. I can’t lose any weight, but instead I gain like no other. Anything high in fiber is a big no-no for people suffering with GP because it causes them to become stuffed up and even bloated sometimes. If I were to eat more than one piece of bread I end up bloating up like I have done at the moment that I am writing this.

There is really no actual cure for this, but there are a lot of people who have taken natural remedies that stop the pain and see some sort of remission from GP. Though it is a very annoying, painful problem, I have chosen not to give up on my quest to do anything in my power to lose weight. Is it possible to lose weight having GP? I like to think so, but only time will tell if I can get where I want to be.

So to close this short post, I’d like to tell anyone that’s been recently diagnosed with GP that there ARE recipes and support groups to help anyone that is inflicted with GP.

The Advice I Never Received

When I was in my Senior year of high school, I went through quite a lot of b.s. that I shouldn’t have. I got pregnant the second semester of my last year and I felt like my life was ruined. There were aspects in every part of the situation that I feel other girls should know and be prepared for in case they are to have this happen to them.

1. Make sure to check out the guy before you get together!

My son’s father, when I first met him, seemed to be an ordinary, nice guy. During our whole relationship I learned that not only was he good at lying, he was not nice at all. If you ever get with someone make sure to find out what they are all about!

2. Don’t believe the lies. 

My ex tried to tell me that he couldn’t use condoms because they didn’t fit. It was my first time EVER and I made the mistake in trusting him. Don’t be stupid like me. If he says it won’t fit then snap back with, “If it doesn’t fit in that, it won’t fit in me.” And then walk away as fast as you can. Or run. Either way, get out of there!

3. Don’t let someone push you around!

When I had gotten pregnant, I went with my ex and told his mother to her face. I felt it would be best to be an adult about these things. Now here is where this advice can go for anyone, whether you are a same sex couple or an opposite sex couple. His mother looked me in the eyes one day while we were at her house eating dinner and told me that I had to move in with her and change everything. She told me which doctor I was going to go to and where I was going to live. I was furious and when I finally went home I told my mother that she expected me to leave everything behind and I cried. I don’t care who you are or what your situation is, if someone tells you to give up everything and do what they say, don’t! His mother tried to get me to move away from everyone and everything I knew because they wanted to control not only my life, but my child’s life as well.

4. Never ignore your gut. 

This should be an easy thing to remember for anyone who’s went through a lot of teenage heartbreak in their short lives. Thankfully, this is one of the few things I kind of listened to, though it was much too late when I found everything out. I had a strong feeling something was wrong for a long time during my relationship, but I ignored it at first. It wasn’t until after I was near my 4th month of pregnancy that I found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me with more than one girl and hitting on some of my friends. I confronted him about it when my friend warned me what he was sending her, and he lied right to my face. He also lied to me about his best friend hating me, and I think that was because he was afraid that his friend would give away his secret. Thankfully his friend decided once he found out for sure to tell me what was going on. I was devastated, but I got over it.

 

I was never told any good advice, and I went in that relationship happy and came out not trusting many people. I lost a lot of friendships over one guy and I feel like others should understand what I went through and try to stay away from people like my ex. He is a very violent guy and I was lucky to never have him hurt me or my child, but others are not that lucky and I think that if they were to feel as though someone cared, maybe they wouldn’t make the mistake of getting into a bad relationship.

Below you can find some links to good websites that offer advice, numbers to call for help, etc. DON’T BE AFRAID TO REACH OUT TO SOMEONE! 

Note: If you have any other websites I should add, please feel free to comment and I’ll add them when I get on again. Thank you! This could help so many!

1. T.E.A.R.- Teens Experiencing Abusive Relationships

2. The National Domestic Hotline

3. Love Is Respect

4. Areas 4 You- Keeping Girls Safe

 

The Longest 3 Months

The last three months have been both a bit scary and sad. My fiance’s best friend died and we have been struggling with all the things surrounding his death to figure out what is truth and what is rumor. I won’t go into detail, but I would like to say a final farewell to him. He was a good guy that never disrespected me or my tight leash I sometimes have on Kyle. He always knew how to make us laugh and though some of the aspects of what happened are really terrible, we will still love him for the man he had been before this tragic problem.

In the last three months, I have also been finding more health problems with myself and I can’t figure out what is wrong with me. Despite it all I’ve been trying to stay positive. I hate that no matter what I do I seem to keep gaining weight and then losing some. It’s confusing for my body and I hate it. I have been exploring ways to improve myself even though I hate that I can’t change some of the things that are causing me to be upset.

I am glad to say that I gave my son a small, but extremely nice, birthday and Christmas. His birthday is in October, so I usually give him maybe one present so he can have better things for Christmas. I read about some parents giving their kids (they are the same age as my child) over 14 presents. Most of these presents are the really expensive things that they don’t need. Why? Maybe to make up for lack of love? I don’t know. Maybe they just like spoiling their kid. No shame in that, but I think my small Christmas with small gifts are what keep my son a nice person.

Really Busy Lately

I’ve been trying to turn my life around from terrible to not as terrible. It’s been a while since I’ve posted because of everything I’ve been going through, and I have had no time to get on here.

So, today I figured I could talk about friendship!

Some people may think that when you talk about friendship it’s nothing but saying corny things about how awesome your best friends are. Yes, sometimes friendship is a corny, love one another thing, but it also is a roller coaster of ups and downs.

Just like any relationship, being best friends comes with some good and bad things, but overcoming them all is what makes it worthwhile. There might be times when you’ll have a “best friend” that is trying to jump off the cliff of sanity and bring you with them. If you try to help them and they won’t allow themselves to be helped, then you should definitely get someone more qualified to help, or distance yourself from them (though I suggest finding someone before walking out on them).

Best friends are people that know how rude, annoying, or too nice you can be, yet they put up with it all because they have some of the best memories with you.

My best friend and I have fought a few times, and though I don’t like the path she has chosen to walk on in life, I still stick beside her. She may live far away from me, but that doesn’t stop the fact that if she were to get married, I’d be hitchhiking my way all the to the wedding because I want to see her on her happiest day.

Best friends can be the best influences or the worst, and sometimes it all depends on the path you decide to take in your life.